Bi, pan, and queer fiction featuring disabled and neurodivergent characters

Bi health month 2023

Bi, pan, and queer fiction featuring disabled and neurodivergent characters

Bi, pan, and queer fiction featuring disabled and neurodivergent characters

Bi health month 2023

The Bi Pan Library is proud to partner with the Bisexual Resource Center (BRC) for the 10th annual Bi+ Health Month this March. We’re curating content all month to help you connected with m-spec (bi, pan, fluid, etc.) authors who are disabled, chronically ill, and neurodivergent and other resources to learn about health topics important to our community such as HIV/AIDS, pregnancy, intimate partner violence, and mental illness.

Now, let’s get to the books — we’ve labelled each one with the health topic the book covers, so you can see at a glance if any of the books reflect your own health conditions or a topic you’d like to learn more about. As always, if there’s a book you think we should add to this list, we’re all ears! Write in using the contact form and tell us all about it.  


Full Disclosure
by Camryn Garrett

HIV

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The uplifting story of an HIV-positive teen, falling in love and learning to live her truth. Simone Garcia-Hampton is starting over at a new school, and this time things will be different. She’s making real friends, making a name for herself as student director of Rent, and making a play for Miles, the guy who makes her melt every time he walks into a room. The last thing she wants is for word to get out that she’s HIV-positive, because last time . . . well, last time things got ugly. As Simone and Miles start going out for real–shy kisses escalating into much more–she feels an uneasiness that goes beyond butterflies. Simone’s first instinct is to protect her secret at all costs, but as she gains a deeper understanding of the prejudice and fear in her community, she begins to wonder if the only way to rise above is to face the haters head-on… Read more…

The Stumptown series
by Greg Rucka and Matthew Southworth

PTSd, addiction

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A pulpy noir comic series following a down-on-her-luck queer private investigator. Dex Parios is the proprietor of Stumptown Investigations, and a fairly talented P.I. Unfortunately, she’s less adept at throwing dice than solving cases. Her recent streak has left her beyond broke and she’s into the Confederated Tribes of the Wind Coast for 18 large. But maybe Dex’s luck is about to change. Sue-Lynne, head of the Wind Coast’s casino operation, will clear Dex’s debt if she can locate Sue-Lynne’s missing granddaughter. But is this job Dex’s way out of the hole or a shove down one much much deeper? Read more…

Sister Mine
by Nalo Hopkinson

birth condition, mobility impairment

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Two sisters, born of a demigod, conjoined at birth, one touched with magic and the other still in search of her gift. Makeda and Abby still share their childhood home. The surgery to separate the two girls gave Abby a permanent limp, but left Makeda with what feels like an even worse deformity: no mojo. The daughters of a celestial demigod and a human woman, Makeda and Abby were raised by their magical father, the god of growing things—a highly unusual childhood that made them extremely close. Ever since Abby’s magical talent began to develop, though, in the form of an unearthly singing voice, the sisters have become increasingly distant. Today, Makeda has decided it’s high time to move out and make her own life among the other nonmagical, claypicken humans–after all, she’s one of them. In Cheerful Rest, a run-down warehouse space, Makeda finds exactly what she’s been looking for: an opportunity to live apart from Abby and begin building her own independent life. There’s even a resident band, led by the charismatic (and attractive) building superintendent. But when her father goes missing, Makeda will have to discover her own talent–and reconcile with Abby—if she’s to have a hope of saving him…

You Exist Too Much
by Zaina Arafat

mental illness

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The captivating journey of one young woman caught between cultural, religious, and sexual identities. When our narrator finally admits to her mother that she is queer, her mother’s response only intensifies a sense of shame: “You exist too much.” She moves into an apartment with her first serious girlfriend and tries to content herself with their comfortable relationship. But soon her longings, so closely hidden during her teenage years, explode out into reckless romantic encounters and obsessions with other people. Her desire to thwart her own destructive impulses will eventually lead her to The Ledge, an unconventional treatment center that identifies her affliction as “love addiction.” In this strange, enclosed society she will start to consider the unnerving similarities between her own internal traumas and divisions and those of the places that have formed her. Read more…

An Unkindness of Ghosts
by Rivers Solomon

neurodivergence

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A raw distillation of slavery, feudalism, prison, and religion that kicks like rotgut moonshine. (Publisher’s Weekly) Aster has little to offer folks in the way of rebuttal when they call her ogre and freak. She’s used to the names; she only wishes there was more truth to them. If she were truly a monster, she’d be powerful enough to tear down the walls around her until nothing remains of her world. Aster lives in the lowdeck slums of the HSS Matilda, a space vessel organized much like the antebellum South. For generations, Matilda has ferried the last of humanity to a mythical Promised Land. On its way, the ship’s leaders have imposed harsh moral restrictions and deep indignities on dark-skinned sharecroppers like Aster. Embroiled in a grudge with a brutal overseer, Aster learns there may be a way to improve her lot–if she’s willing to sow the seeds of civil war. Read more…

Sick Kids In Love
by Hannah Moskowitz

Gaucher disease

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Two chronically ill teens navigate the joys and pitfalls of a relationship in this YA contemporary romance. (Kirkus) Isabel has one rule: no dating. It’s easier… It’s safer… It’s better… for the other person She’s got issues. She’s got secrets. She’s got rheumatoid arthritis. But then she meets another sick kid. He’s got a chronic illness Isabel’s never heard of, something she can’t even pronounce. He understands what it means to be sick. He understands her more than her healthy friends. He understands her more than her own father who’s a doctor. He’s gorgeous, fun, and foul-mouthed. And totally into her. It’s complicated… It’s dangerous… It’s never felt better to consider breaking her rules for him. Read more…

Disoriental
by Négar Djavadi

fertility, pTSd

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A high-spirited, kaleidoscopic story of Iranian history and a modern woman divided between family traditions and her own “disorientalization”. Kimiâ Sadr fled Iran at the age of ten in the company of her mother and sisters to join her father in France. Now twenty-five and facing the future she has built for herself as well as the prospect of a new generation, Kimiâ is inundated by her own memories and the stories of her ancestors, which come to her in unstoppable, uncontainable waves. In the waiting room of a Parisian fertility clinic, generations of flamboyant Sadrs return to her, including her formidable great-grandfather Montazemolmolk, with his harem of fifty-two wives, and her parents, Darius and Sara, stalwart opponents of each regime that befalls them. Read more…

Light Brigade
by Kameron Hurley

military PTSD & injury

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In a futuristic war, oldiers are broken down into light in order to get them to the front lines on Mars. The Light Brigade: it’s what soldiers fighting the war against Mars call the ones who come back…different. Grunts in the corporate corps get busted down into light to travel to and from interplanetary battlefronts. Everyone is changed by what the corps must do in order to break them down into light. Those who survive learn to stick to the mission brief—no matter what actually happens during combat. Dietz, a fresh recruit in the infantry, begins to experience combat drops that don’t sync up with the platoon’s. And Dietz’s bad drops tell a story of the war that’s not at all what the corporate brass want the soldiers to think is going on. Is Dietz really experiencing the war differently, or is it combat madness? Trying to untangle memory from mission brief and survive with sanity intact, Dietz is ready to become a hero—or maybe a villain; in war it’s hard to tell the difference. Read more…

Ben and Beatriz
by Katalina Gamarra

NEURODIVERGENCE, MENTAL ILLNESS

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A vibrant and clever retelling of Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing. Beatriz Herrera is a fierce woman who will take you down with her quick wit and keen intellect. Especially if you come for her sweet BFF cousin, Hero. Beatriz would do anything for her, a loyalty that lands Beatriz precisely where she doesn’t want to be: the ridiculous Cape Cod mansion of super-hot playboy Ben Montgomery. The same Ben Montgomery she definitely shouldn’t have hooked up with that one time… White and wealthy, Ben talks and walks a life of privilege, but wrestles with the politics and expectations of a conservative family he can’t relate to. As her and Ben’s assumptions begin to unravel and their hookups turn into something real, they start wondering if it’s still possible to hold space for one another and the inescapable love that unites them. Read more…

Far From You
by Tess Sharpe

PTSd, chronic pain, addiction

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A beautifully realized YA mystery debut delving into the emotions of a girl recovering from drug addiction and grief. (Kirkus) Sophie Winters nearly died. Twice. The first time, she’s fourteen, and escapes a near-fatal car accident with scars, a bum leg, and an addiction to Oxy that’ll take years to kick. The second time, she’s seventeen, and it’s no accident. Sophie and her best friend Mina are confronted by a masked man in the woods. Sophie survives, but Mina is not so lucky. When the cops deem Mina’s murder a drug deal gone wrong, casting partial blame on Sophie, no one will believe the truth: Sophie has been clean for months, and it was Mina who led her into the woods. After a forced stint in rehab, Sophie returns home to a chilly new reality. Mina’s brother won’t speak to her, her parents fear she’ll relapse, old friends have become enemies, and Sophie has to learn how to live without her other half. To make matters worse, no one is looking in the right places and Sophie must search for Mina’s murderer on her own. But with every step, Sophie comes closer to revealing all: about herself, about Mina and about the secret they shared. Read more…

An Absolutely Remarkable Thing
by Hank Green

adhd, anxiety, depression, PTSd

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A propulsive and entertaining adventure about fame, rhetoric, and radicalization. The Carls just appeared. Roaming through New York City at three a.m., twenty-three-year-old April May stumbles across a giant sculpture. Delighted by its appearance and craftsmanship–like a ten-foot-tall Transformer wearing a suit of samurai armor–April and her best friend, Andy, make a video with it, which Andy uploads to YouTube. The next day, April wakes up to a viral video and a new life. News quickly spreads that there are Carls in dozens of cities around the world–from Beijing to Buenos Aires–and April, as their first documentarian, finds herself at the center of an intense international media spotlight. Seizing the opportunity to make her mark on the world, April now has to deal with the consequences her new particular brand of fame has on her relationships, her safety, and her own identity. And all eyes are on April to figure out not just what the Carls are, but what they want from us. Read more…

Outlawed
by Anna North

acquired disability, mental illness

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The riveting adventure of a fugitive girl, a mysterious gang of robbers, and their dangerous mission to transform an alternate history Wild West. The day of her wedding, 17 year old Ada’s life looks good; she loves her husband, and she loves working as an apprentice to her mother, a respected midwife. But after a year of marriage and no pregnancy, in a town where barren women are routinely hanged as witches, her survival depends on leaving behind everything she knows. She joins up with the notorious Hole in the Wall Gang, a band of outlaws led by a preacher-turned-robber known to all as the Kid. Charismatic, grandiose, and mercurial, the Kid is determined to create a safe haven for outcast women. But to make this dream a reality, the Gang hatches a treacherous plan that may get them all killed. And Ada must decide whether she’s willing to risk her life for the possibility of a new kind of future for them all. Read more…


READ MORE…


Bi, pan, and queer authors on disability and healthcare

Participate in #BiHealthMonth with a pick from this powerful collection of memoir and nonfiction by bi, pan, and queer authors about healthcare, neurodivergence, disability, and mental health. 

Everything to know about Bi+ Health Month

Connect with resources, books, and advice about healthcare topics important to the m-spec community such as disability, sexual wellbeing, abuse, pregnancy, and more.

Need more books? Schedule a visit to the Bi Pan Library

The Bi Pan Library offers free services for the queer community, writers, educators, and anyone else looking to learn. Schedule your virtual visit today!

Bi, pan, and m-spec authors on disability, neurodivergence, and healthcare

Bi health month 2023

Bi, pan, and m-spec authors on disability, neurodivergence, and healthcare

Bi, pan, and m-spec authors on disability, neurodivergence, and healthcare

The Bi Pan Library is proud to partner with the Bisexual Resource Center (BRC) for the 10th annual Bi+ Health Month this March. We’re curating content all month to help you connected with m-spec (bi, pan, fluid, etc.) authors who are disabled, chronically ill, and neurodivergent and other resources to learn about health topics important to our community such as HIV/AIDS, pregnancy, intimate partner violence, and mental illness.

On March 18th, Bi Pan Library founder Bren Frederick will be taking over the BRC’s Instagram to give a tour of the library and chat about how her disability, neurodivergence, and chronic illness have guided the creation of the Bi Pan Library (and share a few book recommendations, because of course). Be sure to follow the BRC to catch the takeover and learn about even more #BiHealthMonth resources!

Now, let’s get to the books — we’ve labelled each one with the health topic the book covers, so you can see at a glance if any of the books reflect your own health conditions or a topic you’d like to learn more about. As always, if there’s a book you think we should add to this list, we’re all ears! Write in using the contact form and tell us all about it.  


The Things We Don’t Say: An Anthology of Chronic Illness Truths
edited by Julie Morgenlender

CHRONIC ILLNESS

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Forty-two writers from around the world, including bi activists Julie Morgenlender and Heron Greenesmith (pieces listed below), open up in fifty true stories about their chronic illnesses and their search for answers, poor treatment by doctors, strained relationships with loved ones, self-doubt, the warmth of support from family and friends, the triumph of learning coping mechanisms, and finding ways to live their dreams. Read more…

  • This Is Hard by Julie Morgenlender
  • My Journey for Answers: Because No One Will Care More About My Health Than Me by Julie Morgenlender
  • Pain by Heron Greenesmith

Continuum
by Chella Man

deaf / hard of hearing

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What constructs in your life must you unlearn to support inclusivity and respect for all? This is a question that artist, actor, and activist Chella Man wrestles with in this powerful and honest essay. A story of coping and resilience, Chella journeys through his experiences as a deaf, genderqueer, pansexual, Jewish person of color, and shows us that identity lies on a continuum — a beautiful, messy, and ever-evolving road of exploration. Read more…

Unbecoming: A Memoir of Disobedience
by Anuradha Bhagwati

military PTSd, sexual assault

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After a lifetime of buckling to the demands of her strict Indian parents, Anuradha Bhagwati abandons grad school in the Ivy League to join the Marines—the fiercest, most violent, most masculine branch of the military—determined to prove herself there in ways she couldn’t before. Yet once training begins, Anuradha’s G.I. Jane fantasy is punctured. As a bisexual woman of color in the military, she faces underestimation at every stage, confronting misogyny, racism, sexual violence, and astonishing injustice perpetrated by those in power. Pushed beyond her limits, she also wrestles with what drove her to pursue such punishment in the first place. Once her service concludes in 2004, Anuradha vows to take to task the very leaders and traditions that cast such a dark cloud over her time in the Marines, and create a program where fellow combat PTSD sufferers can seek relief in community. Read more…

Bisexual Men Exist: A Handbook for Bisexual, Pansexual and M-Spec Men
by Vaneet Mehta

mental, physical, & sexual health

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Being a bisexual man isn’t easy – something Vaneet Mehta knows all too well. After spending more than a decade figuring out his identity, Vaneet’s coming out was met with questioning, ridicule and erasure. Navigating a range of topics, including mental wellbeing and sexual health, Bisexual Men Exist shares Vaneet’s own lived experience as well as personal stories from others in the community to help validate and uplift other bisexual men. The Bi Pan Library was honored to assist with research for several chapters in Bisexual Men Exist, including the health chapter. Read more…

The Pretty One: On Life, Pop Culture, Disability, and Other Reasons to Fall in Love With Me
by Keah Brown

cerebral palsy

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A fresh, thoughtful and charmingly funny collection of essays exploring what it means to be Black and disabled in a mostly able-bodied white America, from bisexual writer and actor Keah Brown. In The Pretty One she explores everything from her relationship with her able-bodied identical twin (called “the pretty one” by friends) to navigating romance; her deep affinity for all things pop culture; the self-hate society encouraged toward her disabled body; and her declaration of self-love with the viral hashtag #DisabledAndCute. Read more…

Marbles: Mania, Depression, Michelangelo, and Me: A Graphic Memoir
by Ellen Forney

bipolar disorder

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Darkly funny and intensely personal, bisexual artist Ellen Forney’s memoir provides a visceral glimpse into the effects of a bipolar disorder on an artist’s work, as she shares her own story through bold black-and-white images and evocative prose. Searching to make sense of the popular concept of the “crazy artist”, she finds inspiration from the lives and work of other artists and writers who suffered from mood disorders, including Vincent van Gogh, Georgia O’Keeffe, William Styron, and Sylvia Plath. She also researches the clinical aspects of bipolar disorder, the strengths and limitations of various treatments and medications, and what studies tell us about the conundrum of attempting to “cure” a brilliant mind. Read more…

You can also check out Ellen’s follow up to Marbles, Rock Steady: Brilliant Advice From My Bipolar Life.

Cornbread, Fish and Collard Greens: Prayers, Poems & Affirmation for People Living with Hiv/AIDS
edited by Khafre Kujichagulia Abif

HIV/AIDS

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A powerful anthology of deeply personal writing by people living with HIV/AIDS, lovingly gathered and edited by bisexual AIDS activist and librarian Khafre Kujichagulia Abif. Abif founded Cycle for Freedom in 2010, a national mobilizing campaign to reduce the spread of HIV among African Americans and Latinos.

Expecting: The Inner Life of Pregnancy
by Chitra Ramaswamy

pregnancy

When bi writer Chitra Ramaswamy discovered she was pregnant, she longed for a book that went above and beyond a manual; a book that did more than describe what was happening in her growing body. One that, instead, got to the very heart of this overwhelming, confusing and exciting experience. Expecting‘s takes the reader on a physical, emotional, philosophical and artistic odyssey through pregnancy. Chitra’s intimate, strange, wild and lyrical essays pay tribute to this most extraordinary and ordinary of experiences. Read more…

Disability Visibility: First Person Stories from the Twenty First Century
edited by Alice Wong

disability, cHRONIC ILLNESS

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In this fierce, galvanizing anthology of contemporary essays by disabled people, editor Alice Wong has included the work of multiple disabled bi/queer authors (pieces listed below). Read more…

  • How to make a paper crane from rage by Elsa Sjunneson
  • Nurturing black disabled joy by Keah Brown
  • Still dreaming wild disability justice dreams at the end of the world by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
  • Falling/burning : Hannah Gadsby, Nanette, and being a bipolar creator by Shoshana Kessock
  • Why my novel is dedicated to my disabled friend Maddy by A.H. Reaume
  • Common cyborg by Jillian Weise

The Collected Schizophrenias
by Esmé Weijun Wang

schizophrenia

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Schizophrenia is not a single unifying diagnosis, and bi/queer author Esme Weijun Wang writes not just to her fellow members of the “collected schizophrenias” but to those who wish to understand it as well. Opening with the journey toward her diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder, Wang discusses the medical community’s own disagreement about labels and procedures for diagnosing those with mental illness, and then follows an arc that examines the manifestations of schizophrenia in her life. In essays that range from using fashion to present as high-functioning to the depths of a rare form of psychosis Wang’s analytical eye allows her to balance research with personal narrative. Read more…

In the Dream House
by Carmen Maria Machado

intimate partner abuse

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Tracing the full arc of a harrowing relationship with a charismatic but volatile woman, bisexual writer Carmen Maria Machado struggles to make sense of how abuse shaped the person she was becoming. She looks back at her religious adolescence, unpacks the stereotype of women-loving-women relationships as “safe” and utopian, and widens the view with essayistic explorations of the history and reality of abuse in queer relationships. Machado’s dire narrative is leavened with her characteristic wit, playfulness, and openness to inquiry. The result is a wrenching, riveting book that explodes our ideas about what a memoir can do and be. Read more…

The Red Zone: A Love Story
by Chloe Caldwell

menstruation, pmdd

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Chloe’s period had often felt inconvenient, uncomfortable, or even painful. It’s only once she’s in her thirties, as she’s falling in love with Tony, a musician and single dad, that its effects on her mood start to dominate her life. Spurred by the intensity and seriousness of her new relationship, it strikes her: her outbursts of anxiety and rage match her hormonal cycle. Compelled to understand the truth of what’s happening to her, Chloe documents attitudes toward menstruation among her peers and family, reads Reddit threads about PMS, attends a conference called Break the Cycle, and learns about premenstrual dysphoric disorder, PMDD, which helps her name what she’s been going through. For Chloe, healing isn’t about finding a single cure. It means reflecting on underlying patterns in her life: her feelings about her queer identity and writing persona in the context of a heterosexual relationship; how her parents’ divorce contributed to her issues with trust; and what it means to blend a family. Read more…

We Are Never Meeting in Real Life
by Samantha Irby

Crohn’s disease, depression

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Sometimes you just have to laugh, even when life is a dumpster fire. With We Are Never Meeting in Real Life., bisexual food blogger and comedian Samantha Irby turns the serio-comic essay into an art form. Whether talking about how her difficult childhood has led to a problem in making “adult” budgets, explaining why she should be the new Bachelorette–she’s “35-ish, but could easily pass for 60-something”–detailing a disastrous pilgrimage-slash-romantic-vacation to Nashville to scatter her estranged father’s ashes, sharing awkward sexual encounters, or dispensing advice on how to navigate friendships with former drinking buddies who are now suburban moms–hang in there for the Costco loot–she’s as deft at poking fun at the ghosts of her past self as she is at capturing powerful emotional truths. Read more…

Care Work: Dreaming Disability Justice
by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha

Disability justice

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In this collection of essays, Lambda Literary Award-winning writer and longtime activist Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha explores the politics and realities of disability justice, a movement that centers the lives and leadership of sick and disabled queer, trans, Black, and brown people, with knowledge and gifts for all. Care Work is a mapping of access as radical love, a celebration of the work that sick and disabled queer/people of color are doing to find each other and to build power and community, and a tool kit for everyone who wants to build radically resilient, sustainable communities of liberation where no one is left behind. Read more…

On Top of Glass: My Stories as a Queer Girl in Figure Skating
by Karina Manta

eating disorders, anxiety

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An insightful memoir from a figure skating champion about her life as a bisexual professional athlete. Karina Manta has had a busy few years: Not only did she capture the hearts of many with her fan-favorite performance at the U.S. Figure Skating Championships, she also became the first female figure skater on Team USA to come out as queer. But On Top of Glass isn’t just a story about Karina’s queerness. It’s also a story about her struggle with body image in a sport that prizes delicate femininity. It’s a story about panic attacks, and first crushes, and all the crushes that followed, and it’s a story about growing up, feeling different than everybody around her and then realizing that everyone else felt different too. Read more…

Deaf Utopia: A Memoir ― and a Love Letter to a Way of Life
by Nyle Dimarco

deaf

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Before becoming the actor, producer, advocate, and model that people know today, Nyle DiMarco was half of a pair of Deaf twins born to a multi-generational Deaf family in Queens, New York. At the hospital one day after he was born, Nyle “failed” his first test—a hearing test—to the joy and excitement of his parents. In this moving and engrossing memoir, Nyle opens up about his sexually fluid identity and shares stories, both heartbreaking and humorous, of what it means to navigate a world built for hearing people. Deaf Utopia is more than a memoir, it is a cultural anthem—a proud and defiant song of Deaf culture and a love letter to American Sign Language. Read more…

Broken (in the best possible way)
by Jenny Lawson

rheumatoid arthritis, depression

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As bi blogger and author Jenny Lawson’s hundreds of thousands of fans know, she suffers from depression. In Broken, Jenny brings readers along on her mental and physical health journey, offering heartbreaking and hilarious anecdotes along the way. With people experiencing anxiety and depression now more than ever, Jenny humanizes what we all face in an all-too-real way, reassuring us that we’re not alone and making us laugh while doing it. From the business ideas that she wants to pitch to Shark Tank to the reason why Jenny can never go back to the post office, Broken leaves nothing to the imagination in the most satisfying way. Read more…

Agorafabulous!: Dispatches from My Bedroom
by Sara Benincasa

agoraphobia

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In Boston, a college student fears leaving her own room—even to use the toilet. In Pennsylvania, a meek personal assistant finally confronts a perpetually enraged gay spiritual guru. In Texas, a rookie high school teacher deals with her male student’s unusually, er, hard personal problem. Bold bisexual humor writer Sara Benincasa has been that terrified student, that embattled employee, that confused teacher—and so much more. Her hilarious memoir chronicles her attempts to forge a wonderfully weird adulthood in the midst of her lifelong struggle with agoraphobia, depression, and unruly hair. Read more…

Unmasking Autism: Discovering the New Faces of Neurodiversity
by Devon Price

autism

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Bisexual social psychologist Dr. Devon Price shares his personal experience with masking and blends history, social science research, prescriptions, and personal profiles to tell a story of neurodivergence that has thus far been dominated by those on the outside looking in. For Dr. Price and many others, Autism is a deep source of uniqueness and beauty. Unfortunately, living in a neurotypical world means it can also be a source of incredible alienation and pain. Most masked Autistic individuals struggle for decades before discovering who they truly are. They are also more likely to be marginalized in terms of race, gender, sexual orientation, class, and other factors, which contributes to their suffering and invisibility. Dr. Price lays the groundwork for unmasking and offers exercises that encourage self-expression. Read more…

In the Body of the World: A Memoir of Cancer and Connection
by Eve Ensler

cancer, sexual abuse

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Bisexual playwright and activist Eve Ensler (playwright of The Vagina Monologues) has devoted her life to the female body—how to talk about it, how to protect and value it. Yet she spent much of her life disassociated from her own body—a disconnection brought on by her father’s sexual abuse and her mother’s remoteness. But Ensler is shocked out of her distance when she is diagnosed with uterine cancer, and through months of harrowing treatment, she is forced to become first and foremost a body—pricked, punctured, cut, scanned. As she connects her own illness to the devastation of the earth, her life force to the resilience of humanity, she is finally, fully—and gratefully—joined to the body of the world. Read more…

Out of the Woods: Nature, Sexuality, and Faith in the Forest
by Luke Turner

depression, sexual abuse, ptsd

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In the wake of a significant breakup, Luke Turner is visited by familiar demons, including depression and guilt surrounding his bisexual identity, experiences of sexual abuse, and confusion brought on by an intensely religious upbringing. With nowhere to turn, Turner seeks refuge in London’s Epping Forest, where unexpected, elusive threats seem to have replaced its former comforts. No stranger to compulsion, Turner finds himself repeatedly drawn to the woods, eager to uncover its secrets and investigate an old family rumor of illicit behavior that once happened there. Away from a society that still cannot cope with the complexities of masculinity and sexuality, Turner finally begins to find acceptance among the trees as he reconciles external expectations with his own way of being. Read more…

Baby Love : Choosing Motherhood after a Lifetime of Ambivalence
by Rebecca Walker

pregnancy

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After a lifetime of ambivalence about becoming a mother, bisexual writer Rebecca Walker decided to have a baby. As a member of the generation who believe in ‘having it all’, a career and a baby, she found that having a baby can mean losing oneself in caring for another. Yet she also found it to be the most meaningful experience of her life… Read more…

Spectrums: Autistic Transgender People in Their Own Words
edited by Maxfield Sparrow

autism

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Written by autistic trans people from around the world and edited by bisexual writer Maxfield Sparrow, this vital and intimate collection of personal essays reveals the struggles and joys of living at the intersection of neurodivergence and gender diversity. Weaving memories, poems and first-person narratives together, these stories showcase experiences of coming out, college and university life, accessing healthcare, physical transition, friendships and relationships, sexuality, pregnancy, parenting, and late life self-discovery, to reveal a rich and varied tapestry of life lived on the spectrums. Read more…


READ MORE…


Fantastic m-spec fiction picks for #BiHealthMonth

Explore queer disability and neurodivergence in fiction with these illuminating, heart-wrenching, romantic, and fantastical books featuring bi, pan, and queer characters.

Everything to know about Bi+ Health Month

Connect with resources, books, and advice about healthcare topics important to the m-spec community such as disability, sexual wellbeing, abuse, pregnancy, and more.

Need more books? Schedule a visit to the Bi Pan Library

The Bi Pan Library offers free services for the queer community, writers, educators, and anyone else looking to learn. Schedule your virtual visit today!

Contemporary YA featuring bi, pan, and questioning Black teens

Contemporary YA featuring bi, pan, and questioning Black teens

Contemporary YA featuring bi, pan, and questioning Black teens


We Deserve Monuments
by Jas Hammonds

Purchase on Bookshop

What’s more important: Knowing the truth or keeping the peace?

Seventeen-year-old Avery Anderson is convinced her senior year is ruined when she’s uprooted from her life in DC and forced into the hostile home of her terminally ill grandmother, Mama Letty. The tension between Avery’s mom and Mama Letty makes for a frosty arrival and unearths past drama they refuse to talk about. Every time Avery tries to look deeper, she’s turned away, leaving her desperate to learn the secrets that split her family in two.
While tempers flare in her avoidant family, Avery finds friendship in unexpected places: in Simone Cole, her captivating next-door neighbor, and Jade Oliver, daughter of the town’s most prominent family—whose mother’s murder remains unsolved.
As the three girls grow closer—Avery and Simone’s friendship blossoming into romance—the sharp-edged opinions of their small southern town begin to hint at something insidious underneath. The racist history of Bardell, Georgia is rooted in Avery’s family in ways she can’t even imagine. With Mama Letty’s health dwindling every day, Avery must decide if digging for the truth is worth toppling the delicate relationships she’s built in Bardell—or if some things are better left buried.

Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute
by Talia Hibbert

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What’s more important: Knowing the truth or keeping the peace?
Bradley Graeme is pretty much perfect. He’s a star football player, manages his OCD well (enough), and comes out on top in all his classes . . . except the ones he shares with his ex-best friend, Celine.
Celine Bangura is conspiracy-theory-obsessed. Social media followers eat up her takes on everything from UFOs to holiday overconsumption–yet, she’s still not cool enough for the popular kids’ table. Which is why Brad abandoned her for the in-crowd years ago. (At least, that’s how Celine sees it.)
These days, there’s nothing between them other than petty insults and academic rivalry. So when Celine signs up for a survival course in the woods, she’s surprised to find Brad right beside her. Forced to work as a team for the chance to win a grand prize, these two teens must trudge through not just mud and dirt but their messy past. And as this adventure brings them closer together, they begin to remember the good bits of their history. But has too much time passed . . . or just enough to spark a whole new kind of relationship?

Things We Couldn’t Say
by Jay Coles

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There’s always been a hole in Gio’s life. Not because he’s into both guys and girls. Not because his father has some drinking issues. Not because his friends are always bringing him their drama. No, the hole in Gio’s life takes the shape of his birth mom, who left Gio, his brother, and his father when Gio was nine years old. For eight years, he never heard a word from her . . . and now, just as he’s started to get his life together, she’s back.
It’s hard for Gio to know what to do. Can he forgive her like she wants to be forgiven? Or should he tell her she lost her chance to be in his life? Complicating things further, Gio’s started to hang out with David, a new guy on the basketball team. Are they friends? More than friends? At first, Gio’s not sure . . . especially because he’s not sure what he wants from anyone right now.
There are no easy answers to love — whether it’s family love or friend love or romantic love. In Things We Couldn’t Say, Jay Coles, acclaimed author of Tyler Johnson Was Here, shows us a guy trying to navigate love in all its ambiguity — hoping at the other end he’ll be able to figure out who is and who he should be.

Let’s Talk About Love
by Claire Kann

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Alice had her whole summer planned. Non-stop all-you-can-eat buffets while marathoning her favorite TV shows (best friends totally included) with the smallest dash of adulting–working at the library to pay her share of the rent. The only thing missing from her perfect plan? Her girlfriend (who ended things when Alice confessed she’s asexual). Alice is done with dating–no thank you, do not pass go, stick a fork in her, done.
But then Alice meets Takumi and she can’t stop thinking about him or the rom com-grade romance feels she did not ask for (uncertainty, butterflies, and swoons, oh my!).
When her blissful summer takes an unexpected turn, and Takumi becomes her knight with a shiny library employee badge (close enough), Alice has to decide if she’s willing to risk their friendship for a love that might not be reciprocated—or understood.

You Should See Me in a Crown
by Leah Johnson

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Liz Lighty has always believed she’s too black, too poor, too awkward to shine in her small, rich, prom-obsessed midwestern town. But it’s okay — Liz has a plan that will get her out of Campbell, Indiana, forever: attend the uber-elite Pennington College, play in their world-famous orchestra, and become a doctor.
But when the financial aid she was counting on unexpectedly falls through, Liz’s plans come crashing down . . . until she’s reminded of her school’s scholarship for prom king and queen. There’s nothing Liz wants to do less than endure a gauntlet of social media trolls, catty competitors, and humiliating public events, but despite her devastating fear of the spotlight she’s willing to do whatever it takes to get to Pennington.
The only thing that makes it halfway bearable is the new girl in school, Mack. She’s smart, funny, and just as much of an outsider as Liz. But Mack is also in the running for queen. Will falling for the competition keep Liz from her dreams . . . or make them come true?

Rise to the Sun
by Leah Johnson

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Three days. Two girls. One life-changing music festival.
Olivia is an expert at falling in love . . . and at being dumped. But after the fallout from her last breakup has left her an outcast at school and at home, she’s determined to turn over a new leaf. A crush-free weekend at Farmland Music and Arts Festival with her best friend is just what she needs to get her mind off the senior year that awaits her.
Toni is one week away from starting college, and it’s the last place she wants to be. Unsure about who she wants to become and still reeling in the wake of the loss of her musician-turned-roadie father, she’s heading back to the music festival that changed his life in hopes that following in his footsteps will help her find her own way forward.
When the two arrive at Farmland, the last thing they expect is to realize that they’ll need to join forces in order to get what they’re searching for out of the weekend. As they work together, the festival becomes so much more complicated than they bargained for, and Olivia and Toni will find that they need each other, and music, more than they ever could have imagined.

This Is Kind of an Epic Love Story
by Kacen Callender

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Nathan Bird doesn’t believe in happy endings. Although he’s the ultimate film buff and an aspiring screenwriter, Nate’s seen the demise of too many relationships to believe that happy endings exist in real life. Playing it safe to avoid a broken heart has been his MO ever since his father died and left his mom to unravel—but this strategy is not without fault. His best-friend-turned-girlfriend-turned-best-friend-again, Florence, is set on making sure Nate finds someone else. And in a twist that is rom-com-worthy, someone does come along: Oliver James Hernández, his childhood best friend. After a painful mix-up when they were little, Nate finally has the chance to tell Ollie the truth about his feelings. But can Nate find the courage to pursue his own happily ever after?

Every Variable of Us
by Charles A. Bush

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After Philly teenager Alexis Duncan is injured in a gang shooting, her dreams of a college scholarship and pro basketball career vanish in an instant. To avoid becoming another Black teen trapped in her poverty-stricken neighborhood, she shifts her focus to the school’s STEM team, a group of self-professed nerds seeking their own college scholarships.
Academics have never been her thing, but Alexis is freshly motivated by Aamani Chakrabarti, the new Indian student who becomes her friend (and crush?). Alexis begins to see herself as so much more than an athlete. But just as her future starts to reform, Alexis’s own doubts and old loyalties pull her back into harm’s way.

Full Disclosure
by Camryn Garrett

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Simone Garcia-Hampton is starting over at a new school, and this time things will be different. She’s making real friends, making a name for herself as student director of Rent, and making a play for Miles, the guy who makes her melt every time he walks into a room. The last thing she wants is for word to get out that she’s HIV-positive, because last time . . . well, last time things got ugly.
Keeping her viral load under control is easy, but keeping her diagnosis under wraps is not so simple. As Simone and Miles start going out for real–shy kisses escalating into much more–she feels an uneasiness that goes beyond butterflies. She knows she has to tell him that she’s positive, especially if sex is a possibility, but she’s terrified of how he’ll react! And then she finds an anonymous note in her locker: I know you have HIV. You have until Thanksgiving to stop hanging out with Miles. Or everyone else will know too.
Simone’s first instinct is to protect her secret at all costs, but as she gains a deeper understanding of the prejudice and fear in her community, she begins to wonder if the only way to rise above is to face the haters head-on…

Off the Record
by Camryn Garrett

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Ever since seventeen-year-old Josie Wright can remember, writing has been her identity, the thing that grounds her when everything else is a garbage fire. So when she wins a contest to write a celebrity profile for Deep Focus magazine, she’s equal parts excited and scared, but also ready. She’s got this.
Soon Josie is jetting off on a multi-city tour, rubbing elbows with sparkly celebrities, frenetic handlers, stone-faced producers, and eccentric stylists. She even finds herself catching feelings for the subject of her profile, dazzling young newcomer Marius Canet. Josie’s world is expanding so rapidly, she doesn’t know whether she’s flying or falling. But when a young actress lets her in on a terrible secret, the answer is clear: she’s in over her head.
One woman’s account leads to another and another. Josie wants to expose the man responsible, but she’s reluctant to speak up, unsure if this is her story to tell. What if she lets down the women who have entrusted her with their stories? What if this ends her writing career before it even begins? There are so many reasons not to go ahead, but if Josie doesn’t step up, who will?

Friday I’m in Love
by Camryn Garrett

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Mahalia Harris wants. She wants a big Sweet Sixteen like her best friend, Naomi. She wants the super-cute new girl Siobhan to like her back. She wants a break from worrying–about money, snide remarks from white classmates, pitying looks from church ladies . . . all of it.
Then inspiration strikes: It’s too late for a Sweet Sixteen, but what if she had a coming-out party? A singing, dancing, rainbow-cake-eating celebration of queerness on her own terms.The idea lights a fire beneath her, and soon Mahalia is scrimping and saving, taking on extra hours at her afterschool job, trying on dresses, and awkwardly flirting with Siobhan, all in preparation for the coming out of her dreams.
But it’s not long before she’s buried in a mountain of bills, unfinished schoolwork, and enough drama to make her English lit teacher blush. With all the responsibility on her shoulders, will Mahalia’s party be over before it’s even begun?

Little & Lion
by Brandy Colbert

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When Suzette comes home to Los Angeles from her boarding school in New England, she isn’t sure if she’ll ever want to go back. L.A. is where her friends and family are (along with her crush, Emil). And her stepbrother, Lionel, who has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, needs her emotional support.
But as she settles into her old life, Suzette finds herself falling for someone new…the same girl her brother is in love with. When Lionel’s disorder spirals out of control, Suzette is forced to confront her past mistakes and find a way to help her brother before he hurts himself–or worse.

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Black Writers on Bisexuality, Gender, and Fluidity

“Dear Bi Pan Library, I have read some non-fiction about bisexuality but I have overwhelmingly just seen books by white people. Do you have any recommendations of bisexual non-fiction by Black writers?” Read more…

12 Bisexual, Pansexual, & Queer Books Releasing in January 2023

It’s a new year, and already there are new m-spec books entering the world! January is bringing us a broad selection of genres, including YA romance, fantasy, educational nonfiction, and literary fiction. Read more…

Bisexual, Pansexual, & Queer Books Releasing in January 2023

Bisexual, Pansexual, & Queer Books Releasing in January 2023

It’s a new year, and already there are new m-spec (bi, pan, fluid, etc) books entering the world! January is bringing a broad selection of titles across many genres, including YA romance, fantasy, educational nonfiction, literary fiction, and more. Each book on this list fits the Bi Pan Library inclusion criteria, but in most cases the library does not have a copy yet.

We’ve included both purchasing links and donation links for each book so you can pick up a copy for yourself or send one directly to the library shelves by way of our wishlist. Preordering books and first-week purchases have a huge impact on a book’s success both in the publishing world and on purchasing platforms, so support queer authors and stories with your dollars — and support the Bi Pan Library’s work at the same time by shopping our Bookshop storefront and affiliate links!

Please note: this list is organized by US release date.


january 3, 2023


The New Life

by Tom Crewe

In this powerful, visceral novel about love, sex, and the struggle for a better world, two men collaborate on a book in defense of homosexuality, then a crime—risking their old lives in the process.

In the summer of 1894, John Addington and Henry Ellis begin writing a book arguing that what they call “inversion,” or homosexuality, is a natural, harmless variation of human sexuality. Though they have never met, John and Henry both live in London with their wives, Catherine and Edith, and in each marriage there is a third party: John has a lover, a working class man named Frank, and Edith spends almost as much time with her friend Angelica as she does with Henry. John and Catherine have three grown daughters and a long, settled marriage, over the course of which Catherine has tried to accept her husband’s sexuality and her own role in life; Henry and Edith’s marriage is intended to be a revolution in itself, an intellectual partnership that dismantles the traditional understanding of what matrimony means.

Shortly before the book is to be published, Oscar Wilde is arrested. John and Henry must decide whether to go on, risking social ostracism and imprisonment, or to give up the project for their own safety and the safety of the people they love. Is this the right moment to advance their cause? Is publishing bravery or foolishness? And what price is too high to pay for a new way of living?

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Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute

by Talia Hibbert

Bradley Graeme is pretty much perfect. He’s a star football player, manages his OCD well (enough), and comes out on top in all his classes . . . except the ones he shares with his ex-best friend, Celine.

Celine Bangura is conspiracy-theory-obsessed. Social media followers eat up her takes on everything from UFOs to holiday overconsumption–yet, she’s still not cool enough for the popular kids’ table. Which is why Brad abandoned her for the in-crowd years ago. (At least, that’s how Celine sees it.)

These days, there’s nothing between them other than petty insults and academic rivalry. So when Celine signs up for a survival course in the woods, she’s surprised to find Brad right beside her.

Forced to work as a team for the chance to win a grand prize, these two teens must trudge through not just mud and dirt but their messy past. And as this adventure brings them closer together, they begin to remember the good bits of their history. But has too much time passed . . . or just enough to spark a whole new kind of relationship?

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Back in a Spell

by Lana Harper

Even though she won’t deny her love for pretty (and pricey) things, Nineve Blackmoore is almost painfully down-to-earth and sensible by Blackmoore standards. But after a year of nursing a broken heart inflicted by the fiancée who all but ditched her at the altar, the powerful witch is sick of feeling low and is ready to try something drastically different: a dating app.

At her best friend’s urging, Nina goes on a date with Morty Gutierrez, the nonbinary, offbeat soul of spontaneity and co-owner of the Shamrock Cauldron. Their date goes about as well as can be expected of most online dates—awkward and terrible. To make matters worse, once Morty discovers Nina’s last name, he’s far from a fan; it turns out that the Blackmoores have been bullishly trying to buy the Shamrock out from under Morty and his family.

But when Morty begins developing magical powers—something that usually only happens to committed romantic partners once they officially join a founding family—at the same time that Nina’s own magic surges beyond her control, Nina must manage Morty’s rude awakening to the hidden magical world, uncover its cause, and face the intensity of their own burgeoning connection. But what happens when that connection is tied to Nina’s power surge, a power she’s finding nearly as addictive as Morty’s presence in her life?

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A Ruinous Fate

by Kaylie Smith

Calliope Rosewood is a witch with a long streak of bad luck. Like all witches in Illustros, her fate is directly tied to Witch’s Dice—powerful artifacts that have blessed her kind with limitless magic but also set them on a path toward destruction. Cursed with unspeakable powers that terrify even the most dangerous witches and fae, Calla deserted her coven four years ago and has been in hiding with her two best friends since. But Calla is also hiding a grave secret: She is only three Rolls away from becoming the last Blood Warrior and starting the Final War that will decimate her people and eradicate their magic.

After a betrayal from her ex leads her one step closer to fulfilling that age-old prophecy, Calla is desperate to do whatever it takes to reset her fate . . . even if that means journeying into the deadly Neverending Forest with said ex and his enticing, yet enigmatic older brother to find the one being who can help her forge her own path.

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january 10, 2023


Friday I’m in Love

by Camryn Garrett

She wants a big Sweet Sixteen like her best friend, Naomi.
She wants the super-cute new girl Siobhan to like her back.
She wants a break from worrying–about money, snide remarks from white classmates, pitying looks from church ladies . . . all of it.

Then inspiration strikes: It’s too late for a Sweet Sixteen, but what if she had a coming-out party? A singing, dancing, rainbow-cake-eating celebration of queerness on her own terms.

The idea lights a fire beneath her, and soon Mahalia is scrimping and saving, taking on extra hours at her afterschool job, trying on dresses, and awkwardly flirting with Siobhan, all in preparation for the coming out of her dreams. But it’s not long before she’s buried in a mountain of bills, unfinished schoolwork, and enough drama to make her English lit teacher blush. With all the responsibility on her shoulders, will Mahalia’s party be over before it’s even begun?

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The Daughters of Izdihar

by Hadeer Elsbai

As a waterweaver, Nehal can move and shape any water to her will, but she’s limited by her lack of formal education. She desires nothing more than to attend the newly opened Weaving Academy, take complete control of her powers, and pursue a glorious future on the battlefield with the first all-female military regiment. But her family cannot afford to let her go–crushed under her father’s gambling debt, Nehal is forcibly married into a wealthy merchant family. Her new spouse, Nico, is indifferent and distant and in love with another woman, a bookseller named Giorgina.

Giorgina has her own secret, however: she is an earthweaver with dangerously uncontrollable powers. She has no money and no prospects. Her only solace comes from her activities with the Daughters of Izdihar, a radical women’s rights group at the forefront of a movement with a simple goal: to attain recognition for women to have a say in their own lives. They live very different lives and come from very different means, yet Nehal and Giorgina have more in common than they think. The cause–and Nico–brings them into each other’s orbit, drawn in by the group’s enigmatic leader, Malak Mamdouh, and the urge to do what is right.

But their problems may seem small in the broader context of their world, as tensions are rising with a neighboring nation that desires an end to weaving and weavers. As Nehal and Giorgina fight for their rights, the threat of war looms in the background, and the two women find themselves struggling to earn–and keep–a lasting freedom.

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The Sapphire Altar

by David Dalglish

Cyrus wants out. Trained to be an assassin in order to oust the invading Empire from his kingdom, Cyrus is now worried the price of his vengeance is too high. His old master has been keeping too many secrets to be trusted. And the mask he wears to hide his true identity and become the legendary “Vagrant” has started whispering to him in the dark. But the fight isn’t over and the Empire has sent its full force to bear upon Cyrus’s floundering revolution. He’ll have to decide once and for all whether to become the thing he fears or lose the country he loves.

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january 12, 2023


Queer Heroes of Myth and Legend: A Celebration of Gay Gods, Sapphic Saints, and Queerness Through the Ages

by Dan Jones

Hidden in the margins of history books, classical literature, and thousands of years of stories, myths and legends, through to contemporary literature, TV and film, there is a diverse and other-worldly super community of queer heroes to discover, learn from, and celebrate.Be captivated by stories of forbidden love like Patroclus & Achilles (explored in Madeleine Miller’s bestseller Song of Achilles), join the cult of Antinous (inspiration for Oscar Wilde), get down with pansexual god Set in Egyptian myth, and fall for Zimbabwe’s trans God Mawi. And from modern pop-culture, through Dan Jones’s witty, upbeat style, learn more about 90s fan obsessions Xena: Warrior Princess and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Neil Gaiman’s American Gods and the BBC ‘s Doctor Who.

Heroes of Queer Myth & Legend brings to life characters who are romantic, brave, mysterious, and always fantastical. It is a magnificent celebration of queerness through the ages in all its legendary glory.

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january 14, 2023


As You Walk on By

by Julian Winters

Seventeen-year-old Theo Wright has it all figured out. His plan (well, more like his dad’s plan) is a foolproof strategy that involves exceling at his magnet school, getting scouted by college recruiters, and going to Duke on athletic scholarship. But for now, all Theo wants is a perfect prom night. After his best friend Jay dares Theo to prompose to his crush at Chloe Campbell’s party, Theo’s ready to throw caution to the wind and take his chances.

But when the promposal goes epically wrong, Theo seeks refuge in an empty bedroom while the party rages on downstairs. Having an existential crisis about who he really is with and without his so-called best friend wasn’t on tonight’s agenda. Though, as the night goes on, Theo finds he’s not as alone as he thinks when, one by one, new classmates join him to avoid who they’re supposed be outside the bedroom door. Among them, a familiar acquaintance, a quiet outsider, an old friend, and a new flame…

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january 17, 2023


Tears in the Water

by Margherita Scialla


At White Ravens University, where athletes train to become professional sportspeople, Alex is on the swimming team with her best friend, Xiuying. Having grown up mostly alone, parents absent and brother often busy with his own life, Alex tends not to meet new people unless she and Xiuying are together.
After an embarrassing encounter with a boy from the volleyball team Alex soon discovers that the world isn’t so big after all and the universe has a funny way of setting people up, especially when and with whom they’re least expecting.
Despite her reserved character, Alex becomes part of a newly formed friend group consisting of four amazing people with different identities and personalities. As she tries to overcome her anxiety and negative past events, Alex finds herself both struggling with romantic feelings for a new acquaintance and a full blown gender crisis.

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Glitterland

by Alexis Hall

Once the golden boy of the English literary scene, now a clinically depressed writer of pulp crime fiction, Ash Winters has given up on hope, happiness, and–most of all–himself. He lives his life between the cycles of his illness, haunted by the ghosts of other people’s expectations.

Then a chance encounter throws him into the path of Essex-born Darian Taylor. Flashy and loud, radiant and full of life, Darian couldn’t be more different…and yet he makes Ash laugh, reminding him of what it’s like to step beyond the boundaries of his anxiety. But Ash has been living in his own shadow for so long that he can no longer see a way out. Can a man who doesn’t trust himself ever trust in happiness? And how can someone who doesn’t believe in happiness ever fight for his own?

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january 19, 2023


Bisexual Men Exist: A Handbook for Bisexual, Pansexual and M-Spec Men

by Vaneet Mehta

“You’re just being greedy.”
“Are you sure you’re not gay?”
“Pick a side.”

Being a bisexual man isn’t easy – something Vaneet Mehta knows all too well. After spending more than a decade figuring out his identity, Vaneet’s coming out was met with questioning, ridicule and erasure. This experience inspired Vaneet to create the viral #BisexualMenExist campaign, combatting the hate and scepticism m-spec (multi-gender attracted spectrum) men encounter, and helping others who felt similarly alone and trapped.

This powerful book is an extension of that fight. Navigating a range of topics, including coming out, dating, relationships and health, Vaneet shares his own lived experience as well as personal stories from others in the community to help validate and uplift other bisexual men. Discussing the treatment of m-spec men in LGBTQ+ places, breaking down stereotypes and highlighting the importance of representation and education, this empowering book is a rallying call for m-spec men everywhere.

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Godkiller

by Hannah Kaner

In solidarity with the HarperCollins strike and the workers’ request to hold coverage of HarperCollins titles, no description or purchase links are available for this book. Details will be added once HarperCollins negotiates with the workers in good faith and come to an agreement. To learn more about how to support the strike, click here.

One Night in Hartswood

by Emma Denny

When Penn and Raff meet in Hartswood Forest the only truth they know of each other is a brief moonlit kiss they had shared previously. But Penn is escaping a life of cruelty, and an arranged marriage to a woman he has never seen. Raff is tracking the elusive missing groom of his sister to restore his family’s honour. Neither are looking for a travelling companion. Yet both men find themselves drawn to each other in ways neither imagined.

Unaware of their true identities they venture north together through Hartswood Forest. And, as their bond deepens, their fates become irrevocably entwined. But, with one escaping a life of duty and one tracking a fugitive, continued concealment threatens everything they know and trust in each other. So when secrets are finally revealed, and the consequences of their relationship become clear, both must decide what they will risk for the man they love.

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january 24, 2023


After Sappho

by Selby Wynn Schwartz

“The first thing we did was change our names. We were going to be Sappho.”

Ignited by the same muse, a myriad of women break from their small, predetermined lives for seemingly disparate paths: in 1892, Rina Faccio trades her needlepoint for a pen; in 1902, Romaine Brooks sails for Capri with nothing but her clotted paintbrushes; and in 1923, Virginia Woolf writes: “I want to make life fuller and fuller.”

Writing in cascading vignettes, Selby Wynn Schwartz spins an invigorating tale of women whose narratives converge and splinter as they forge queer identities and claim the right to their own lives. A luminous meditation on creativity, education, and identity, After Sappho announces a writer as ingenious as the trailblazers of our past.

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6 Times We Almost Kissed

by Tess Sharpe

After years of bickering, Penny and Tate have called a truce: they’ll play nice. They have to. Their mothers (life-long best friends) need them to be perfect, drama-free daughters when Penny’s mother becomes a living liver donor to Tate’s mom. Forced to live together as the Moms recover, the girls’ truce is essential in keeping everything–their jobs, the house, the finances, the Moms’ healing–running smoothly. They’ve got to let this thing between them go.

There’s one little hitch: Penny and Tate keep almost kissing.
It’s just this confusing thing that keeps happening. You know, from time to time. For basically their entire teenaged existence.
They’ve never talked about it. They’ve always ignored it in the aftermath. But now they’re living across the hall from each other.
And some things–like their kisses–can’t be almosts forever.

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The Buried and the Bound

by Rochelle Hassan

As the only hedgewitch in Blackthorn, Massachusetts–an uncommonly magical place–Aziza El-Amin has bargained with wood nymphs, rescued palm-sized fairies from house cats, banished flesh-eating shadows from the local park. But when a dark entity awakens in the forest outside of town, eroding the invisible boundary between the human world and fairyland, run-of-the-mill fae mischief turns into outright aggression, and the danger–to herself and others–becomes too great for her to handle alone.

Leo Merritt is no stranger to magical catastrophes. On his sixteenth birthday, a dormant curse kicked in and ripped away all his memories of his true love. Desperate for answers, he makes a pact with Aziza: he’ll provide much-needed backup on her nightly patrols, and in exchange, she’ll help him break the curse. When the creature in the woods sets its sights on them, their survival depends on the aid of a mysterious young necromancer they’re not certain they can trust. But they’ll have to work together to eradicate the new threat and take back their hometown… even if it forces them to uncover deeply buried secrets and make devastating sacrifices.

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january 26, 2023


Haruko/Love Poems

by June Jordan

In trailblazing poet, essayist, teacher and activist June Jordan’s poems, love is a vision of revolutionary solidarity, crossing borders both emotional and literal with an outstretched hand. Haruko traces the faltering arc of a passionate love affair with another woman while Love Poems encompasses relationships with men and women, political resistance, the need for self-care in a demanding, uncaring world and apocalyptic visions of the eruption of Mount Vesuvius that destroyed Pompeii and Herculaneum.

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january 30, 2023


Sorry, Bro

by Taleen Voskuni

When Nareh Bedrossian’s non-Armenian boyfriend gets down on one knee and proposes to her in front of a room full of drunk San Francisco tech boys, she realizes it’s time to find someone who shares her idea of romance.

Enter her mother: armed with plenty of mom-guilt and a spreadsheet of Facebook-stalked Armenian men, she convinces Nar to attend Explore Armenia, a month-long series of events in the city. But it’s not the mom-approved playboy doctor or the wealthy engineer who catch Nar’s eye–it’s Erebuni, a woman as immersed in the witchy arts as she is in preserving Armenian identity. Suddenly, with Erebuni as her wingwoman, the events feel like far less of a chore, and much more of an adventure. Who knew cooking up kuftes together could be so . . . sexy?

But there’s one teeny problem: Nar’s not exactly out as bisexual. Her worlds will inevitably collide, but Nar is determined to be brave and to claim her happiness: proudly Armenian, proudly bisexual, and proudly herself for the first time in her life.

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JANUARY 31, 2023


Then Everything Happens at Once

by M.E. Girard

In solidarity with the HarperCollins strike and the workers’ request to hold coverage of HarperCollins titles, no description or purchase links are available for this book. Details will be added once HarperCollins negotiates with the workers in good faith and come to an agreement. To learn more about how to support the strike, click here.


OTHER BOOKLISTS YOU MIGHT ENJOY


Black writers on bisexuality and fluid sexuality

Dear Bi Pan Library, I have read some non-fiction about bisexuality but I have overwhelmingly just seen books by white people. Do you have any recommendations of bisexual non-fiction by Black writers?

16 Nonfiction Books to Help You Explore Outside the Gender Binary

Whether you’re newly questioning your gender, have known you’re nonbinary for a while and want to settle your roots deeper, or even if you’re cis and looking to learn more about how to support and respect your friends outside the binary books are a great way to start!

Some links in this post are affiliate links, which support the Bi Pan Library’s operation at no additional cost to you. Read more about the Bi Pan Library’s affiliate relationships here.

Bisexual non-fiction by Black writers

SERIES: ASK THE BI PAN LIBRARY

Black writers on bisexuality and fluid sexuality

Hello 🙂 I have read some non-fiction about bisexuality but I have overwhelmingly just seen books by white people. Do you have any recommendations of bisexual non-fiction by Black writers?
Much love, Christine

Hi Christine, what a delightful question!

There is quite a bit of writing about bisexual and sexually fluid identity by Black writers, and I’ve compiled a booklist below across a variety of forms. A few of the individual essays are found in difficult-to-find out-of-print books, so if you are interested in a particular essay but cannot purchase or borrow the book yourself, please contact me to set up a viewing or scan of the library’s copy.

I also want to note that although this list focuses on published works, because that is what the Bi Pan Library primarily focuses on, printed-and-bound books are just one of many ways to engage with the deep well of Black bisexual/fluid experience and wisdom. Digital resources like blogs, social media, YouTube, and podcasts are also fantastic ways to connect with modern Black bisexual/fluid perspectives. For this reason, I’ve included a list of Black bisexual/fluid activists and creators at the end of this post to give you (and your social media algorithms) a jump start.

BOOKS focused on bi/fluid identity

Finding the B in LGBTQ+ History: Tips & Tools for Learning Bisexual+ History by Angélique Gravely
Conjuring Black Funk: Notes on Culture, Sexuality, and Spirituality by bisexual scholar and activist H. Sharif Williams, perhaps the most prominent living Black bisexual writer.
Black Enough Man Enough: Embracing My Mixed Race and Sexual Fluidity by Gee Smalls

ESSAYS

• “A New Politics of Sexuality” by June Jordan is a powerful piece of bisexual writing. It was originally published in The Progressive in 1991, but was later published in essay collections such as Some of Us Did Not Die. The Bi Pan Library has a copy of the original issue of The Progressive
• “Erotic Computer: Janelle Monáe’s Black Queer Femme Representation and the Lens of Audre Lorde’s Writing” by Jessica Brough(from The Bi-ble: New Testimonials)
• “‘I Still Feel Like I Can’t Quite Be Myself’: Bisexual Students’ Experiences with Invisibility, Marginalization, and — Exclusion Within LGBTQ+ Camps Spaces” by Jayna Tavarez(from The Bi-ble: New Testimonials)
• “Fluid Desire: Race, HIV/AIDS, and Bisexual Politics by Elias Farajaé aka Manuel Kalidas Congo (from Bisexual Politics: Theories, Queries, and Visions)
• “Politics of the Bisexual Deep-Fry” by Michèlle T. Clinton (from Bisexual Politics: Theories, Queries, and Visions)
• “Celebrating bisexuality, beyond the silos” edited by mpho ndaba
• Several sections that may be of interest to you in Sexuality, Religion and the Sacred: Bisexual, Pansexual and Polysexual Perspectivesparticularly “Part II: Indigenous and Decolonizing Spiritual Discourses”. 
Eliminating Biphobia Through Breath, Brotherhood, and the Arts by H. “Herukhuti” Sharif Williams
• “Worth the Balancing” by Alan Silver (from Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out)
• Many personal essays, poems, and interviews throughout the history of Bi Women Quarterly!
• Several personal narratives, poems, interviews, and art pieces in Plural Desires: Writing Bisexual Women’s Realities you may find interesting. Notably, it was published in collaboration with Sister Vision: Black Women & Women of Color Press.
• Several personal narratives from Black bi/pan/fluid men in Rec*og*nize the Voices of Bisexual Men, co-edited by H. Sharif Williams. 
• Several personal narratives from Black bi/pan/fluid people in Getting Bi : Voices of Bisexuals Around the World.

MEMOIR & BIOGRAPHY

The Yards Between Us: A Memoir of Life, Love, and Football by R. K. Russell covers Russell’s journey as the first active player in the NFL to come out as bisexual.
Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body by Roxane Gay discusses her relationships with men and women. 
Fire Shut Up in My Bones by Charles M. Blow discusses questioning his sexuality and coming out as bisexual.
A Woman Like Me by Bettye LaVette discusses her relationships with men and women.
• Any of bisexual humorist Samantha Irby’s essay collections (We Are Never Meeting in Real LifeWow No Thank You, and Meaty) discuss her love and sex life.
• The biography Alice Walker: A Life and Rebecca Walker’s memoir Black, White, and Jewish: Autobiography of a Shifting Self. Alice Walker (author of The Color Purple) and her daughter Rebecca Walker (prominent activist, coined the term “third wave feminism”), both identify as bisexual. Rebecca has another memoir about parenting, called Baby Love : Choosing Motherhood after a Lifetime of Ambivalence.
Soldier: A Poet’s Childhood by June Jordan. I read this quite a while ago and do not recall if she discusses her bisexuality, but I do remember it was very good!
My Life in Porn: The Bobby Blake Story by Bobby Blake covers his experience in the adult entertainment industry as a Black bisexual man.

POETRY ABOUT identity, LOVE AND SEXUALITY

Directed by Desire: The Collected Poems of June Jordan by bisexual poet June Jordan
The Body in Its Seasons and This Isn’t Godhood by bisexual/queer poet Maz Hedgehog / M.S. Ikeji
Race. Resistance. Love. by bisexual poet H. Sharif Williams
Black Queer Hoe by pansexual/queer poet Britteney Black Rose Kapri

books focused on THE HARLEM RENAISSANCE

I am including a short list of books about sexually fluid figures during the Harlem Renaissance because it is a fascinating and particularly well-documented period of Black bi/pan/fluid history.

Blues Legacies and Black Feminism: Gertrude “Ma” Rainey, Bessie Smith, and Billie Holiday by Angela Y. Davis
Heat Wave: The Life and Career of Ethel Waters by Donald Bogle
Wayward Lives, Beautiful Experiments : Intimate Histories of Social Upheaval by Saidiya Hartman
Lady Sings the Blues by Billie Holiday
Color, Sex and Poetry: Three Women Writers of the Harlem Renaissance by Gloria T. Hull

creators and activists

Let’s be honest, I can’t even scratch the surface of Black bisexual activism here — consider this a list of fantastic people whose work and social media feeds will lead you toward many, many more Black creators and activists who should have your attention.

• Scholar, educator, theorist, writer, poet, and hem netcher tepi H. Sharif Williams.
• Speaker, writer, educator and advocate Angélique “Angel” Gravely.
• Scholar, educator, and speaker Blair Imani.
• Writer, poet and actor Kimberly L Session.
• Performer, podcaster and activist Bob the Drag Queen / Caldwell Tidicue.
• Singer-songwriter, poet, writer, and activist Denarii Grace.
• Writer and podcaster Aubree Calvin.
• Writer, organizer, and campaigner Rhammel Afflick.
• Writer, poet, and performer Maz Hedgehog.
• Speaker and diversity consultant Sanisha Wynter.
• Abolitionist lawyer and writer Andrew Reginald Hairston.
• Writer, actor, and activist Keah Brown.
• Writer, director, and actor David J. Cork.

Christine, I hope this list helps you get started! If you keep exploring, you’ll find new books and authors the Bi Pan Library should know about — stay in touch and let me know what we’re missing!

Do you have a question for the Bi Pan Library? Let us know what you’re searching for, we’re here to help.

16 Nonfiction Books to Help You Explore Outside the Gender Binary

16 Nonfiction Books to Help You Explore Outside the Gender Binary

Whether you’re newly questioning your gender, have known you’re nonbinary for a while and want to settle your roots deeper, or even if you’re cis and looking to learn more about how to support and respect your friends outside the binary, books are a great way to start. Different people need different kinds of maps when they set out exploring, so we’ve gathered 15 varied and easy-to-jump-into self help, personal essay, poetry, and memoir titles to send you on your way…

Whether you’re newly questioning your gender, have known you’re nonbinary for a while and want to settle your roots deeper, or even if you’re cis and looking to learn more about how to support and respect your friends outside the binary, books are a great way to start. Different people need different kinds of maps when they set out exploring, so we’ve gathered 15 varied and easy-to-jump-into self help, personal essay, poetry, and memoir titles to send you on your way…


EXPLORE THROUGH SELF-HELP BOOKS


How to Understand Your Gender: A Practical Guide for Exploring Who You Are by Alex Iantaffi and Meg-John Barker

Purchase on Bookshop

Have you ever questioned your own gender identity? Do you know somebody who is transgender or who identifies as non-binary? Do you ever feel confused when people talk about gender diversity?

This down-to-earth guide is for anybody who wants to know more about gender, from its biology, history and sociology, to how it plays a role in our relationships and interactions with family, friends, partners and strangers. It looks at practical ways people can express their own gender, and will help you to understand people whose gender might be different from your own. With activities and points for reflection throughout, this book will help people of all genders engage with gender diversity and explore the ideas in the book in relation to their own lived experiences. (Publisher’s copy)

Trans Power: Own Your Gender edited by Juno Roche

Purchase on Bookshop

“All those layers of expectation that are thrust upon us; boy, masculine, femme, transgender, sexual, woman, real, are such a weight to carry round. I feel transgressive. I feel hybrid. I feel trans.”

In this radical and emotionally raw book, Juno Roche pushes the boundaries of trans representation by redefining “trans” as an identity with its own power and strength, that goes beyond the gender binary.

Through intimate conversations with leading and influential figures in the trans community, such as Kate Bornstein, Travis Alaban